A Friendly Warning on Hydras

Hey Everypony, Sandy Rivers here to tell you what you need to know to survive in this crazy world! Now, I'm usually a pony that prefers to be as prepared as possible for any contingency but sometimes you make mistakes and they say that experience is the best teacher. Well, some lessons experience teaches with a little slap on the wrist where other messages it likes to beat you with over the head until you can't remember where it was you started. That being said, I offer a disclosure to you all: never do what I did.

Some of you may be alarmed to see a Hydra in and around Ponyville. This is natural. Hydras are carnivorous predators and Ponies are herbivores that may be seen as prey by the Hydra in the wild so your 'fight or flight' instinct may kick in. However, there's an easy way to make a distinction that could save you a lot of headache and an otherwise embarassing moment. When you see a Hydra, look closely: what color is it? If it's a muddy copper or orange with lime-green eyes, you probably have yourself a Swamp Hydra. In that instance, running is highly recommended or, if running is not a viable option, hiding. Self urination isn't necessary but it's not frowned upon either. If it's a light brown with aqua-green eyes, you probably have a Horned Hydra. Horned Hydras are dramatically different from their Swamp-residing cousins. First and foremost, Horned Hydras have an instinct called the Killer Imprint. In a nutshell, when it sees a new prey, it imprints that prey into its brain and it must track it down and kill it. Should you be alarmed by this? Absolutely not! Luckily, the Hydra has imprinted on yours truly so no other pony is in any danger of mauling, trampelling or consumption. You may find the Hydra asking for me or hoping to speak in private. This is normal. It's trying to catch and eat me so you needn't find the behavior suspicous.

Oh, right. I probably should have mentioned that it's intelligent. That's kind of important. It seems to be on the intillectual level of a Dragon not much unlike our local river serpent or library assistant. Additionally, thanks to revelations from Sapphire Night, it appears to like cherries. Feel free to chat it up, have a nice dinner with it, invite it to tea or play a game of charades. As long as I'm still alive, you have nothing to fear from it. In fact, it seems to be quite friendly! Just, if you happen to find me missing, I'd recommend keeping your distance from it until it imprints on another pony. Well, that's all for now! Just remember: Muddy or Copper, run like Rainbow Dash; Light Brown, tea and party games. It could save your life, you know!

-Sandy Rivers